sofi grace

Not long ago we had some friends over. As we were visiting the question came up as to whether or not we are finished having children. We answered generally that we didn't know, but that we are always open to adopting or foster parenting if the God brought the opportunity our way.

The next day we received a call. A child had been abandoned at birth, and we were given the opportunity to legally adopt her on the spot.

We froze.

How could this be? What would we do? What is the process? What are the legal ramifications? Is the child sick? Does she have HIV? Would the mother come back to find her? What should we do?

Kerrie and I took some time to talk and pray.

Then we remembered our conversation with our friends just one day earlier. We remembered the times we had talked about this before. We had committed to God and to each other that we would make ourselves available for this very opportunity.

What were we even talking about? Praying about? What situations could we possibly be “weighing” that outweigh the reality that a newborn baby has been abandoned. A response of “no thanks” would shuffle her through a corrupt adoption process that could lead to who knows what.

We picked up our phone and made the call. “We’d love to have her.”

We were asked for personal information, documents, etc, so they could prepare the paperwork. They told us to stand by, make preparations, and we would be able to pick her up the next morning.

That night we prepared, physically and mentally, for the arrival of a new daughter and sister. We bought diapers, formula, and various baby needs. We prayed together and began getting excited. As a family we decided on the name Sofia Grace.

The next morning we received a call telling us to be patient - that it was probably going to be later in the day. We waited. That evening, we finally got the call.

We were shocked to hear that the mother had come back. She had come back early that morning, claiming to want her child and was apologetic for her actions. A social worker spent the day with her and ultimately decided that she was genuinely apologetic, and had a unique reason for her behavior. The decision had been made that she could keep her daughter.

We were stunned. We didn’t know how to react. The kids (especially Madi) were crushed. Madi had been thanking God for answering her prayers in providing this opportunity. Our emotions were all over the place. Hard to describe.

We were sad. We cried. We had questions for God.

Maybe it was a test of our faith. Maybe it was preparation for a future opportunity. We finally settled on the conclusion - it's not our place to figure it out.  We trust him.